Procrastination Station

2009

December
November 3
October 3
September
August 1
July 1
June
May 1
April 1
March 1
February 1
January 1

2008

December 2
November
October
September 1
August 3
July 1
June
May 6
April 2
March 6
February 3
January

2007

December 1
November 3
October 4
September 3
August 3
July 2
June 3
May 14
April 23
March 50
February 12
January
This sh*it is unacceptable.
May 1st

The Safest Sex

Me: Wow, it is incredibly hot in this room.
Friend: It's not that bad.
Me: I don't know what it is lately. I just feel like my body is really out of sync. I get these hot flashes and then I feel sick, like I'm gonna throw up.
Friend: Uh, does this usually happen in the morning?
Me: Sometimes.
Friend: You have a boyfriend right?
Me: Yeah.
Friend: Hm. I don't want to be intrusive here, but when's the last time you got your period?
Me: HAHAH.
Friend: Why's that funny?
Me: I am NOT pregant.
Friend: How do you know? Does your boyfriend pull out cause that's not always 100% safe.
Me: No, no, no. You don't understand. There is NO way I'm pregnant.
Friend: Hey, ya never know. Even if you're on birth control and he uses a condom, there's always that chance.
Me: Ha, no, really. I'm not pregnant. It's just not possible. Long distance, phones, the computer... it doesn't get any safer than that.
May 1st
This site is basically telling me to get a...
Apr 27th
Match.com ads on a teen fan site? Way to promote adolescent...
Apr 27th

Donde Estan Mis Pantalones?

Becky: Oh my god. Alexa, you're wearing jeans!
Me: Uh, is that a bad thing?
Becky: No, it's just that I never see you with pants on.
Apr 25th
Think Twice Before You Twitter
Apr 25th
“Everybody’s supposed to have a chance in the United...”
— You tell ‘em John...
Apr 25th
Me as a Southpark character! :)
Apr 25th
S&M = Happiness?
Apr 24th
WOW.  I can’t tell whether they’re kissing on...
Apr 21st
Warch Watch
Tumblr, baby, you’ve been so neglected.  Here’s a video treat juuuust for you
Apr 19th
“[Rappers] are not talking about no collegiate basketball...”
— Snoop Dogg on Rappers vs. Don...
Apr 12th
Warch Watch
oh my gawd. do i laugh at the fact that these guys are arguing about pokemon or cry because...
Apr 9th
Dear Aladdin, do you take Mickey to be your...
Apr 8th
“Alexa, why the hell are you wearing your hair in pigtails?...”
— Laura at rehearsal
Apr 8th
Warch Watch
I guess you know you’re really a celebrity when Ashton Kutcher thinks you’re worthy of...
Apr 8th

Mindless Entertainment

This game is dumb yet I still spent maybe 15 minutes playing it.  Just click groups of 3 or more...
Apr 4th

Poem of the Day

If You Were Coming In The Fall by Emily Dickinson. If you were coming in the fall, I’d...
Apr 4th

My Personality

I’m testing out a new site called MyCyberTwin (www.mycybertwin.com) and part of the setup asks...
Apr 3rd

Man, that USB key gets around

WTH. If the USB port was a vag, it’d be whoring itself out. These days, what CAN’T you...
Apr 3rd

Once you go gay, it never goes away?

Ali: Yeah, she got back together with her ex...ya know, the one who was gay.
Me: WHAT?!
Ali: Yep. They broke up because he was gay.
Me: And now they're back together?
Ali: Uh huh.
Me: That's so weird. See, I'm a firm believer that there is a wall of sexuality that divides hetero and homo. Once you penetrate that wall, that's it. Seal's broken. Can't go back.
Ali: Penetrate. I love it.
Apr 3rd
“Did you see my URLTea? jerk-off at eBay relisted his...”
— I adore Bret for saying things...
Apr 3rd
Wow...and I thought my mom liked taking...
Apr 2nd
I need a new Ipod…one that looks exactly like this.
Apr 2nd
My next investment. Like omg, it’s totally gonna like,...
Apr 2nd